Painting army to grow to city-destroying number

It has now been 2 MONTHS since I finished a velvet painting! In order to create more paintings for my velvet painting army, I am going to take an velvet sabbatical from November 26-Dec 2nd. I'm taking time off from work and everything! My art army will grow!
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Art explosion!

When last you heard of our hero (Clockworkalien), he was creating a Rampage painting. FEAR NOT!
...I have completed that painting
...I also whipped up a shirt for the Glow celebration that was just at the Triangle Ranch
...and here is a Fallout velvet painting.

Let me know what you think of the paintings!

Also, if you have not seen Dr. Horrible's Sing-Along Blog, spend 40 minutes and watch it RIGHT NOW (provided you are on some sort of class or lunch break):

It has super-villains, Niel Patrick Harris, and singing! How could you resist clicking on it? HOW!?!

I'l alive!

I'm back from the two week megaventure of helping conduct a (workshop/running equipment/teaching about wireframes/working on site diagrams/meeting up with Connecticut friends/meeting up with a New Jersey friend/shopping for art/drinking/seeing 2 contestants from this season of Project Runway/shopping for clothing in Manhattan/shopping for art/wandering Manhattan/shopping at a New Hampshire flea market) in (Long Island/New York/New Hampshire). As a result, I now am (so tired of partying/joyful/hung over/experiencing a +1 increased skill in public speaking/wearing damn fashionable clothes/have a picture of a cyberpunk geisha with a Louis Vuitton bag for my wall).

And no, these are not multiple choice...I really have don all of the clustered together things in the last 2 weeks! I'll get back to a regular posting cycle soon and crank out some more velvet paintings. Later!

More paintings at Shot in the Dark!

If you are bored of the velvet paintings hanging at Shot in the Dark Cafe, don't panic. I added two more paintings to join the armada of paintings already up there (what do you call a group of paintings? A peckle? A herd? A snozzberryful?).

Well, while I was nailing the two new ones on the wall this past weekend, I talked to a regular customer. She liked my Joust Painting. I eventually found out her favorite game was Rampage on her Mac.

I took it as a sign to start my Rampage painting for my next work on black velvet. Basic concept of the painting: Lizzie at 0%. You'll see ;)

The art and science of surprise parties

A computer hacker was once quoted:
"Say you have an ultra-secure vault with the only key. On a whim, you decide to have the key copied and give it to your best friend. You immediately compromised the security of the vault by 50%."

It's a fairly sound philosophic argument...and I think the same principle applies to surprise parties. The more people that are invited or know about the party, the greater the probability that one of the attendees will ruin the surprise. I will one day discover the ideal mathematical formula for the exact number of surprise party attendees you can invite before someone ruins it for the birthday boy/girl.
Without even sharpening a pencil, it is safe to assume that the giant surprise party that happened in the movie Cloverfield is impossible in real life.

So today is my roomate's "surprise" party...he knew about it two days ago when he was talking to one of the guests:
Attendee: Could you watch my son on Tuesday?
Roommate: Sorry I have plans to go out for sushi. (Clockworkalien's note: This was where he was going to be while we are setting up his party) What's happening on Tuesday?
Attendee: Err, you aren't supposed to know. (Clockworkalien's note: He could have REALLY screwed up here with a blatantly transparent excuse [Like: "I have attend my Ghostbusting 101 class at Pima." Not only is Ghostbusting 101 not a class, it is not a word in the Firefox spellchecker.]. I need to buy this guy the Handbook of All-Purpose Excuses: Social Engagement edition. The chapter on generic familial needs is such a page turner!)

Have any of you (my loyal readers) been to a surprise party where the birthday-ee REALLY didn't know about it? If so, how may guests were there?

Sprint Tech Support: Now with 120 times the anger!

1) Over the weekend, my phone started displaying a "SERVICE REQUIRED" message (preventing me from placing calls or text messages), yet anyone calling my number still gets voicemail.
2) Spending 1 hour with Sprint business tech support, most of the time spent powering down and powering on the phone.
3) The tech support guy tells me that there must be a local outage from Phoenix.
4) He tells me that I would need to get a replacement from a local Sprint store.

Now all of this I don't have a problem with (other than losing all of your numbers AGAIN!), it is just that I wish companies would own up to a mistake and warn cutomers in advance.

Why do I feel this way? Oh, spending 5 minutes on Google came up with this shocking development:
6) It is a known issue with this phone that if certain keys are pressed when the phone starts up, it locks up and you have to get a firmware upgrade.

Rather than wasting an hour of my time, the tech support guy could have mentioned this sometime around minute 5 of the call and I would have felt 100 times less anger than I do now (that's 150 times less anger than in a Boston Market Family Size meal!)

So once again, I have lost my lovely contact list with all of your numbers. Feel free to email me your info so I can send you rambling text messages ;)

Oh, and I'll be off to Chicago for a week. Message if you want a postcard or present from there! ;)

Peter Pepper's sworn enemy!

With all my paintings either sold, given away, or at Shot in the condo walls are devoid of black velvet paintings.

As I was both hungry and needed a velvet painting to adorn the walls, I completed a food and video game-inspired painting.

And for the last time, if you cook me a giant hamburger, please do not walk over the patty. I don't care how big the burger is or how many angry Eggs and Hot Dogs are after your ass...just throw it on the grill.